Do it until your fingers bleed, then keep doing it
What do you want?
Not on the surface level...not the cool things, but what do you really want?
I sit and ask my soul....
I get the similar answers to yesterday...
consistent multiple 5 figures flowing in each month automatically, 6 high-end private clients who love to work with me & love to pay me, to have 3 soul-shaking published books, to host sold-out mastermind days to hundreds of women...
And
Love....I want love, to love & to be loved fully as I am...I want to fall into an ocean of it...
I want to be wrapped up in it...my heart is aching to love...
I see that I have not been allowing myself to receive it fully & not fully been sharing it...
Because I'm afraid of falling in too deep...of not being able to get out...
But that's also what I desire the intoxicating love...
Or perhaps it's the fear of going in so deep but for it to be empty, for it to be dull...but that too would be perfect because then I know to go deeper, because I know that's not it.
To not to hold back, because I trust that I will always find my way home, that I'm always home...
Where else am I not going in all the way?
Where else have I let doubt or fear sneak in and tell me it's not possible to have or experience the thing to the depth that I actually desire?
I've definitely had doubt creep in around my business...multiple times...
And I haven't been deciding quickly enough that the path where the money dries up, where I'll have to cut my expenses & live in a Thai hut asking 'how much is that?' before I commit to buying a mango and then respond with 'it's too expensive' and spend 20mins driving around to find a cheaper one because.
God no!
I decide when doubt comes in that that is not my story, that in a moment thousands of dollars can flow into my account, that I can allow love in, that my soul client will reach out to me....
So I decide again & again....I check in where I've started to lower the bar because doubt has come in saying 'well this is more realistic'...
Fuck you 'realisticness'...I ain't go space for you here.
But...I also do what needs to be done...
I take action...I show up...I do what's important...
I'll do it until my fingers are bleedingĀ (I don't know why they would be bleeding? from typing so much?)... I do it again & again, I will use different angles....
I do not let defeat roadblock me...I do not lower the bar
I decide, I commit, and I do not stop.
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