What to do on the Pedestal?

Put me on the pedestal, because it has nothing to do with me...

It's not actually me on there but it's a mannequin.

I cannot fall from grace because it was never me to begin with, it is a projection, a facade.

I did not step up there.

I may disappoint, I may not live up to your expectations.

But actually that is none of my business, that's all about you...

This is the concern of being on a pedestal right?

That there is only one way to go from up there and that's south, that we will eventually disappoint.

Perhaps a part of us enjoys it, enjoys being idolised, I know I certainly do....I even enjoy saying 'don't idolise me' ....but go on and idolise me, witness me...

But the thing is it's actually rarely me...most people see what they want to see- be that something positive or negative, it's there own projection...

If we step up on the pedestal if we focus on the pedestal we become the performer, we aim to entertain, to please....

I certainly aim to entertain, but more than entertaining others, I aim to entertain myself...

On the pedestal there is this pressure to keep up the charade, to meet the expectation of how we think we need to show up...

I see many leaders become more and more famous, and as they do they become more & more narrow in how they allow themselves to be seen...

God forbid if they do anything the crowd doesn't like...because if you speak your truth it's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when...

I see them back-pedal, fumble & apologise...I've done this too...when I didn't really mean it, I was sorry for hurting others, no actually, I was more sorry for the rath of fire coming down on me, I hated the way it felt, I wanted it to stop. I was just fucking uncomfortable because I much prefer to be loved for my own sense of validation...

I allowed myself to be on the pedestal, to be focused on the peoples reactions as a sign on what I should do, how I should act, what I should say...

I'm all for growing & for shifting perspectives if it's expansive....but I will NEVER apologise or back peddle for being me & speaking my truth again. EVER.

More important than admiration, more important than money.....is my commitment to being me, no matter what the cost...

Because there is no greater cost than loosing ourselves...and there is no greater prize than finding ourselves...

Just because the people appoint us onto a pedestal doesn't mean we need to engage with it...we are not a fucking puppet...

I don't get angry when someone puts me up there, in fact I feel honoured that they have found inspiration in a facade inspired from a projection they saw from me...

It has nothing to do with me...

I get onto the business of being me & living my life...

I'll certainly accept the roses & money, but I'm not attached to it...

And as for the rotten tomatoes, throw it at me, it's just a mannequin...but if I feel like having fun I'll dump a whole garbage truck on you.

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